Why they became member of the O.T.O. 29 the internet saved my life
From: "XXX"
To: "Peter-R. Koenig" koenig @ cyberlink.ch
Date: February 2000
I wish to make a disclaimer here. It has never nor ever will be my
intention to embarass or discredit anyone or any Thelemic orginization
or otherwize. My intentions here are mainly to make a contribution to
your excellent research, my place in Thelemic history (Major or minor)
and most importantly to bridge the gulf of indiffrence in Thelema. I
don't mind conveying information as long as those conditions are met.
I was born Aug.21st 1952. I am the oldest of five. I 'visited' 4
diffrent grade schools from 1959-19667. I was interested in the Cubs
Scouts, Comic books and not much else but fooling around with the
neighborhood kids. A boring existance realy.
Most of the family went to E** in 1974 and I stayed in N**. I got a job
actualy working for the golf course through D** as he got a real full
time job there cutting the greens and such.
D** and I moved in and out of the young peoples group, and I remember
being on unemployment a lot and welfare. In 1976 I got the offer to
work doing janitorial in C**. Ok. I visited E** once in the summer of
19t6 but did not stay.That did'nt last long and I founfd myself on
unemployment again (UIC) and living back in N**. ... I transfered my UI
up to E** and found a job doing Security work. I believe it was Sept
1978 I hooked up with a wargame group that played at the University. It
was in Nov. I ended up meeting this cute little blonde named E**. E**
and I got to like each other right off. She was just 17 and I was 25.
She was also into the SCA and I basicly followed her into that.
Anyway the SCA met regualry at the UofA, and that was Wednesday nights.
I looked forward to them because I got to see E** mainly. I think it
was about Feb. 1980, While E** and I were on the bus heading home we
hooked up with this guy from the meeting named R**. E** seemed to take
a likeing to him Of course I was very defencive here. Not much happened
from therer but I rememeber it was on a rainy night in April. Actualy
this would be April 25th.acording to my diary. I callled E** around 9pm
and H** said she's over at R**. Who? Oh that R**. "What's he doing over
there?" "I don't know but I don't like the looks of things with him,"
She said. "Why? He seems okay with me," "I've been hearing funny
things," "What do you mean?" I asked. "He's into this devil worship."
"What the heck is that?" "That's all I know. I'm concered." She added
bla bla bla.
Well. That was enough for me. Devil worship huh? I told her I'd pay R**
a visit and get E** back.I've seen movies and stuff like the 'Exorcist'
and B movies about witches and had a vauge idea that she was getting
mixed up in some kind of Satanic thing. It was raining lightly and I
boarded a #1 bus out to R** place near the East end of town along
xxxxx. All kinds of images and ideas came to me and my apprehension
grew. I was going to deal with this guy.
I got off at what I thought was the appropiate stop and walked to his
building Five Oaks apts. I looked at the buzzer directory and found a
R**. I buzzed. "Where's my girlfriend?" "You can come up when your less
hostile." He said and left me hanging. I went for a Coke at this nearby
store and thought it over. I returned and buzzed him again. "Sorry
about that R**. Can I see E*? He buzzed me up and I knocked on his
door. He let me into his unfurnished apartment. E** was nowhere in
sight. "Where's E**? I asked softly. She came out with a sour look on
her face, not very happy to see me. She just took a spot on the floor
and browsed over a book or something. I was getting worried. "Are you
Okay?" She glarred at me. R** offered me a glass of wine and we taled a
bit. I noticed this chrome tubed pyramid in the living room. I was onto
something here. "I use that for meditation. E** can I see you for a
moment?" I drank the wine and looked around. I could hear R** and E**
saying something like, "I don't want him here," But R** had other
ideas.I suppose he quelled her hostillity towards my uninvited arival.
She went back to her place on the floor. R** saw me lookig at this
framed item on the wall. "What the heck is a Liber OZ?" He got up from
E** and came over to walk me through it. He read it out point by point.
Ok I can agree with this. That looks good. Ok, fine great. No problem.
"Who is this Aleister Crowley fella anyhow?" I asked. I never heard the
name before. R** not a yet Minerval bagan going into it. He was tellig
me how he wants to form this House of Templars, the SCA etc..E** was
softening a bit as well. I was getting high on the wine and R** was
removing E** bra. For some reson this did disturb me. I should have
acted in a hostile manner. E** then,went in some kind of trance when I
returned from the bathrom. She ws naked and in some kind of a trance.
"Come join us." I think she said. and we ended up having sex in the
living room and then, on his waterbed. Two guys and one girl. It was a
first for me. There was no gay activity, just R** and I enjoying E**.
After that any thought of rescuing E** honor evaporated. We were no
longer virgins.
A few weeks latter I bought my first Crowley book: 'Diary of a drug
fiend', and the Thoth Tarot deck R** suggested I begin a magikal diary
and I started this May 12th 1980 and I 've been writing in it every day
since then. R** and E** were with me when I bought them a A***
bookstore. June of 1980 R** and I intended on making a trip down to V**
to get ratan for SCA swords. You could not get this kind of wood here
for some strange reason. We were heavily involved in the SCA and R**
kept the OTO away from us. I did not even know this until later. R**
introduced me to R**S** saying he is the representative of Crowleys OTO
here in A**.
E** broke up with me June 7th 1980, and I learned from R**S** that it
was R** doing.I was pissed off . Here was something of which I had no
control of. Well E** and I got back together but only on a friendship
level. R** was basicly trying to train E** as his scarlet woman and
swapped her around with guys he thought would bennifit her.
The summer of 1981 I was basicly working Temp work and I ended up
taking my Minerval initiation Sept.26th 1981 with R**. and D**. Ru* was
the initiator and third degree at that time.
E** and Ch* got married in the summer of 1982. This July 1981-June
1982, on the southside close to where N** Chapter is. The OTO had two
bodies at that time. The J** Chapter and N***. I affiliated myself with
N** and E** and H*. They were also loosely connected to the SCA at the
time.(1978).E** I affiliated myself more with E** because back in 1980
when I first met him he asked me how far did I want to go in magick. He
was the only one that expressed any real concern with helping me out.
In the summer of 1982 N** hosted the Grady Mcmurty tour. They intended
to hold the slide show at the public Libary but this did not pan out so
E** asked if they could utilize my wall in my basement suit. Sure. T**
had left me awhile ago so I had the place to myself. I remember Grady.
He was a kind good sort of fellow. Liked to chuckle a lot. R** was over
at my place and we had a hit of acid and a good time with the slide
show. Grady loved to smoke the pipe.When he was running the projector
he kept dropping burnt tabacco dropings all ove my rug. The place was a
mess, but I would not trade those experiences for anything. I got onto
working agai at Army & Navy at the wearhouse and lasted thre from
1982-1989.
I have a I*st degree certificate with Grady's seal here in front of me.
The date is August 14th 1982 In blue wax. There is no other seal on the
certificate other then, Grady's. I recall Grady reading from something.
It could have been a photo copy of Francis King's infamous text.I'm not
sure.This was 18 years ago. Long before Lo** and St*** arived on the
scene. Sexmagick? I knew of the subject of sexmagick from R** and R**
practiced it a lot. He was into gaining control over another through
the use of his sperm in a vagina. I can't seem to think of the name.
Eucuchist or something? Other then, that not that I was aware of. But
then, again I was not with Grady all the time he was here. E** could
have chatted about it with Grady without my knoledge. I held a
stupefaction of Grady when he was here and kept my distance in a
respectfull way.I have somewhere a yellow flyer somewhere about the
tour.There was no yoga Asana,or Dharana or otherwize in my pressence.
R** moved onto V*** to form an OTO camp there called Horus Babalon.It
lasted from 1983-1988. There was an incedent involving a Minerval
initiation and R** holding a sword and the police called in and OTO
Grand Lodge had to shut them down.
About H***. From what I gather R** lived with his scarlet woman at the
time in the suburb called 'Kittsalino'. this is a very rich area near
UBC. I have never been to HB or seen R** preform an initiation. Basicly
from what I know, (please don't mention my name anywhere.) Somebody at
the time of the initiation called the police as this thing was going
down. Possibly the prospect's companion or somebody else there.
Actualy, I recal when I was first in his apartment here in E** he
had this Samuri sword. Cradle and all. I woneder if it was this sword?
HB has a document (URL H*** Babalon) on the net and refrence to a
Brother 220. maybe this persson callled it in. From what I gather R**
held a sword at the prospect and the person got scared and panicked. A
fight broke out and somebody there called in the police to either break
it up or make arrests. I had heard from Ch** who's friend B**T**
relayed to Ch** that R** is in or was in jail. because of that? I don't
know. The charges? I don't know. This was a local civil matter and the
only involvment that the OTO had in this was in the area of Ordanace.
Ie, to determine the future of HB. That was it. That was their only
role. There was nothing sinister about it. As for the members I'm not
sure. There is a camp in B*** which is greater V** called S** Camp, and
perhaps some of the members are there. This is why I'd like to track
down R**. There is a bookstore in Surry that he used to go t called P**
books.R**'s got a good heart, just an unbridled ego. We used to spend
hours playing chess and drinking slurpees at xxxx where he lived and I
won more games then, I care to count. He is self serving but I know R**
and I can see right through him. Ru**S**, there is another story.
I had not seen R** since the Grady initiation.
I got my second degree initiation from D** Her A** camp.Jan.31st
1987. D** was IV* at the time and I beieve he went onto 5th but I
hav'nt seen D** since about 1990. I first met St** outside of the OTO.
St** and I knew the same people and shared simmilar interests such as
Starfleet battles and other wargaming interests with our friend M**. I
was surprized to know at long last I have a real friend in the Order. I
ended up taking my III* Dec.12th 1992 at N** Lodge. St** and
clicked from the first day. I am very hapy that he got married. Nobody
deserves it more. I have not met his wife yet. It was in the mid 1990's
that I retuened to my SF writing. published a few sories in the small
press, nothing profesional yet. When I get a word processing package I
hop to get back into it. I aslo need a printer. May in the summer.
Well life sort of got in the way and St** and I lost contact with each
other. ... I just recently got onto the internet and have been enjoying
it ever since.
The years after my father passed away were probably my darkest in
Thelema. This would be 1996-July of 1999. During those three years i
seperated from Thelema and sought comfort in Jesus. Well, I began to
realize this as not the way to go. I was even more alone in that then,
anyting else. Actually it was the Art Bell talk radio program that
opened my eyes to the possibillities, and corrected me. Art Bell and
the internet saved my life.
